if i happened to be roaming the african or european deserts or i found myself in the depths of some south american rainforest for some reason. and by a stroke of pure luck or fate, stumbled across an old rusty ‘magic genie containing’ lamp i would —

immediately wish to be immortal

wish to be interesting forever

and wish to never feel any emotion for the rest of my infinite life

yeah i know i’d be sacrificing alot of good feeling. but those always seem to come with alot of painful shit ones i’d rather not have. hurting sucks. living forever doesn’t.

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20

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whitney matewe

         but my chances of becoming a sociopath are only improving everyday! mega win!

she doesn’t understand me. i’m the girl who doesn’t want the picket fence and two point five kids. or the mortgage that comes with mister husband. i’m the girl who dreams of living in a cottage on the fringe of nowhere. daydreams of sitting in a tree in the woods watching the sunrise. writing meaningless pieces of writing about monsters and demons and devils. she doesn’t trust me. because i’m different from her. i’m not the same girl she was. not naive and willing — to fall for the wrong guy. and find myself married to a selfish cheater at twenty two.

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19

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whitney matewe

anyone can describe an image or a moment or a feeling given enough words. but real art is saying everything without saying alot. making every word count. making every word matter.

it’s harder than it sounds.

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17

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whitney matewe

“i always sorta saw myself falling in love with a guy on the subway. a guy in scuffed up sneakers and a grey woolen hat reading a book of poems.”

…

“except i live in texas, there’s no subway.”

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14

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whitney matewe

“hell is empty and all the devils are here” — w.shakespeare

only because i released them all.

to lay waste to the world.

you’re welcome.

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12

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whitney matewe